I had a lot written down in poorly formed metaphors I thought might hide the things I'm feeling well enough for me not to feel self conscious,
but fuck it.
I've been smiling more lately than I have in the past 4 years. That's not an exaggeration. I am excited about things. I'm in love with all of this.
...but
After every fit of giggles or quiet smiles to myself there is a familiar heaviness. And I hate you for that.
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